Last night we finished packing what we could of our birth bags. There is a very neatly organized list located next to our bags so that we know what else to add when the moment comes.
Yes, we are planners. Or rather, I am a planner and Jason has wisely learned to jump on board.
We had an appointment with our midwife yesterday and as we approach May (our estimated birth month) our appointments get closer and closer together and I have realized how mentally unprepared I am to progress from this pregnancy.
In the final month of pregnancy it is so easy to get caught up in the constant heart burn and swollen ankles or the new found difficulty of every day tasks, but I love this experience. I love the connection I get to have with the little life inside of me; it's incredible. For the last 9 months I have been able to provide a safe refuge for a child of God as they have learned the very basics of life - muscle control, breathing, sucking. I have been blessed to play a roll in the creation of a life. I love seeing the look of amazement on Jason and Atticus' faces when they get to see/feel the baby move or hear the heartbeat. I love that my body knows what to do to adjust for all the changes happening inside of me. Being able to carry this child is a tremendous blessing and I get to experience it firsthand and see all the incredible ways that it brings our family closer together. It's a beautiful thing.
With all that in mind, I know there are plenty of blessings to look forward to beyond pregnancy and that pregnancy is a preparatory step for all the wonderful adventures ahead.
It is time for me to prepare mentally for the transition and prepare to let go of this part of the journey when the time comes. That means it is time to give up control and accept the time line and plan that Heavenly Father has for our growing family. Whenever that time comes, I know that our love will grow and expand as we welcome another member to our family.
Love,
-Laura (and the rest of the Clog Crew)
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