My Birthday

Today, I celebrated my birthday. It isn't actually my birthday. But in our little family we select a nearby Saturday to really celebrate the day when we can all be together.

Now, I haven't always been a lover of my birthday, but I have to admit that I am becoming more so every single year and this year was no exception. Jason and the kids just did an absolutely incredible job. In the weeks leading up to my birthday, I could see how excited the kids were getting about the whole thing. Milayla and Atticus were often asking for permission to make a little surprise for my birthday (which turned out to be beautiful cards and snowflakes!) and would ask me questions about my birthday. It all really impressed on  my heart just how much children have the capacity to love. And not just that, but how much they will mirror how they see those around them express love. As I saw them as busy as can be with efforts to do what they could to make it a special day, my heart just overflowed and felt like it just might burst. They are incredible.

And so when Milayla was up this morning well before our normal wake up time because she did not want to miss out on getting the birthday stuff ready I felt pretty loved. And then Milayla made sure to drop off a crown for me to colour in my room while they set everything up downstairs. And Atticus left a card on my pillow. I even got to snuggle up with them for books in time and open up a card and snowflake from Milayla. Such precious moments. They were so super thoughtful.

Breakfast was awesome. And seeing Phineas trot up the stairs to usher me downstairs for breakfast was supreme. I think he is really starting to get onboard for the birthdays. He was such a great trooper today and a HUGE helper. He was so eager to help with everything, more so than usual. And couldn't wait to be in pictures. Oh how I loved getting extra snuggles with each of the kids today.

Then I had suggested that we head for a hike. We were a little late to leave which worked out perfectly because we got there just after it stopped raining. It was the biggest hike the kids have done (5.4km total which is a lot for little legs) but there were no complaints. They were so happy to be out in the woods and make continuous remarks about how awesome it was. We praised them a lot. Even Phineas walked for almost a couple kilometres of it until it started getting a little too rocky for him and he was getting tired. They listened really well to the guidelines we set out for a safe hike and really did awesome.

When we finished Atticus remarked at how much energy her still had left to play at the playground at the base of the hike. And we certainly did enjoy playing at the play ground. The kids are excited at the prospect of more hiking this year and so are we. Though, I think we will keep them a little on the shorter side for now. Atticus loved hearing how Jason and I did a steep incline hike up to a castle when I was 36 weeks pregnant with him.

We had snacks on the mountain, and lunches at the playground. Then headed home to the sound of the children proclaiming how much they enjoyed the outing. We opened gifts when we got home. The kids had picked out two new games for us to play as a family (rather the perfect gift because they know how much I love spending time together) and they helped Jason pick out a new yoga mat for me (my 9 year old yoga mat has paid it's dues for sure). I had told Jason and the kids that I really just wanted a day spent with them for my birthday. That really would have been more than enough. However, I most certainly appreciate the extra thought that they put into selecting gifts that they knew I would like.

So, we got right in to playing Mouse Trap (one of the new games) while the AMAZING cake that Jason made was cooking in the oven. We paused the game a few times while the kids got cleaned up and I helped Jason a bit in the kitchen. Ultimately, Milayla trapped us all. And we all sat down to a super delicious dinner of butter chicken, basmati rice, salad, steamed green beans, and papadum (we got the papadum with mango chutney from a nearby indian restaurant that we like). Jason makes amazingly awesome butter chicken. And we all love indian food. Phineas ate three helpings and I know the rest of us ate our fair share as well.

And we topped it off with a great cake. I think Angel Food Cake has kind of become known as Momma's cake. Jason mastered a gf one a couple years back so if anyone wants it for their birthday cake he takes over for baking the cake (I'm happy to bake the other cakes that the kids request).

But in the end, that's all just food and all the most delicious food in the world would not matter if I didn't have Jason, Atticus, Milayla and Phineas really putting there love into making this a great day. We talk about our favourite parts of the day when we sit around the dinner table and hearing all the positive feelings about the day just made me so incredibly happy. Seeing those smiling faces around the table and getting to spend the entire day with them is just the best. The best.

After we had tucked the kids into bed and got the kitchen tidied up I headed upstairs to get cleaned up and Atticus was coming out of his room. I snuggled him up on my lap and we just sat there and talked. I told him that I wished I could freeze time. He was over-the-moon excited about the idea. He told me that if we could freeze time it would be perfect because then everyone else would think it had only been one day but that we could have lived 200 years of life in that one day and that we could just spend so much time together and even go to hotels. I smiled. Things like that make my heart happy because I feel like I must be doing something right.

So, as I have had a lot of time to reflect on turning 30. I've decided that I definitely don't ever want to be 20 again. I appreciate all the ways that I have grown and learned and how they help me understand that I have a lot more growing and learning to do. But, perhaps, the most important thing that I feel I have learned to do better and more of is increasing my capacity to love deeper and wider than ever before. There is no doubt that I love Jason and these three kiddos with every fibre inside of me, and yet, I still manage to love them more each and every day. So as I continue to grow and learn (and age) I hope to continue to lengthen and deepen my capacity to love. First, and foremost for my family, but also more broad reaching as well.

And as for my birthday celebration today. While I have said it a million times over today, I cannot have ever said it enough, so I will be sure to have it in written record as well. Thank you, Jason, Atticus, Milayla and Phineas for making this a spectacular day. I love you. So very much.